20X20

I was a hard taskmaster
Grudgingly polite
Most often grouchie and
Uncomfortable
I dwelled on her negatives
My mind justifying my
Disposition
I certainly knew how to be
Pissed
Always defining the principle of a
Thing with a pet peev
So with ease I misjudged
Misunderstood
Misplaced
The love that I craved
From her
Too good
Too be lacking
Too bad to be perfect
I gave more
Bullshit than I received
I guess...
Hindsight...
And what not
20times20times
Would come and go
To and fro
Back and forth
Like a crazy dog running into
A clean glass door
I was too dumb for my own good.
I couldn't see beyond my reflection
Fearing rejection
So I projected my negatives
Directed my insults
Suspected results
That were assinine
That's how love escaped me
I was too rigid
Too petty
I thought of I alone
And now she's gone.
Like the thrill...
She's gone
And loneliness is a bitter pill
To swallow.